Gaslighting In Relationships
January 13, 2023
If you spend any time on the self-help side of social media, you’ve probably heard the term “gaslighting” thrown around as it becomes part of the mainstream vocabulary. But what does it really mean to gaslight someone, and how can you defend yourself if it happens to you?
What is "Gaslighting?"
Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which someone makes you doubt your thoughts, feelings, and perception of reality. The term is named after the 1944 film,
Gaslight, where the main character’s husband slowly convinces her that she is going insane. As in the movie, an abusive person can gain power over you by eroding your self-trust, allowing them to avoid accountability for wrongdoing or making you dependent on them in your decision-making. This can be done through various tactics, like denying events that you know happened, manipulating evidence to make you question your recollection of events, or even planting false memories in your mind.
Recognizing Gaslighting
Gaslighting can be incredibly damaging, as it can cause you to doubt your sanity and even lead to long-term psychological damage. You can protect yourself by learning to recognize it and preparing ways to respond.
Here are some signs that you may be experiencing gaslighting:
- You constantly second-guess yourself.
- You feel like you’re going crazy or that something is “off,” but you can’t put your finger on it.
- You feel isolated and disconnected from others.
Responding to Gaslighting
Once you realize that someone in your life is gaslighting you, it’s important to take action. Here are some steps you can take to respond to gaslighting:
- Document what’s happening. Keep a record of the events and conversations that are causing you to doubt yourself. This can help reassure yourself and others that you’re not imagining things.
- Set boundaries with the person who is gaslighting you and make it clear that their behavior is unacceptable. This might involve setting limits on how much time you spend with them or telling them that you won’t engage in discussions that make you feel uncomfortable. Some helpful phrases for setting these boundaries can include:
- “I was there and know what I saw/heard.”
- “I’m not interested in debating what happened with you.”
- “I’m making this decision for myself.”
- “I hear what you’re saying, and it isn’t what I experienced.”
- “I need space, and I’m walking away from this conversation.”
- Seek support. It’s crucial to have a support system in place when dealing with gaslighting. This might include friends, family, or a therapist who can provide a safe and supportive space to talk about what’s happening.
Gaslighting can be a difficult and mentally draining experience but remember you have the power to take control of your own reality and seek help when needed. Don’t let anyone make you doubt your own thoughts, feelings, or experiences. In case no one has told you recently, you have incredible value and worth and no one can take that away.
If you took the first abortion pill, it’s possible to start wishing you hadn’t. The regret may have hit you immediately, or it might have taken a few hours to realize that you want to continue the pregnancy. Either way, there may still be something you can do: abortion pill reversal (APR) may be an option. The first drug used in the abortion pill regimen is usually mifepristone. If you have taken mifepristone but now want to continue your pregnancy, call the Abortion Pill Reversal Network at 1-877-558-0333 right away. Their Helpline is available 24/7 and can connect you with a medical provider who can administer APR. If You Have Only Taken the First Pill Mifepristone works by blocking progesterone. Progesterone helps maintain the lining of the uterus during pregnancy. When this hormone is blocked, the uterine lining thins, and the pregnancy ends. The second drug in the abortion pill regimen is misoprostol , which causes the uterus to contract and expel the pregnancy. Abortion pill reversal involves giving progesterone after mifepristone in an effort to allow the pregnancy to continue. Don’t Wait for Symptoms Before Calling You may wonder whether you should wait before deciding what to do. But if you want to try to continue the pregnancy, call first. It’s critical to start the protocol as soon as possible, ideally within 24 to 48 hours of taking mifepristone. However, you should still call even when more time has passed; it may not be too late. A medical provider can determine whether APR may still be appropriate. Does Reversal Always Work? Abortion pill reversal cannot guarantee that the pregnancy will continue. One published study reported ongoing pregnancy rates of approximately 64% to 68% with certain progesterone regimens, but individual outcomes vary. The important thing is to get medical guidance quickly rather than trying to determine your chances on your own. What if You Already Took Misoprostol? If you have already taken misoprostol, contact a healthcare professional promptly and explain exactly what you took and when. You should also seek immediate medical attention if you develop symptoms that concern you or believe you may be experiencing a medical emergency. Make the Call Now Changing your mind after taking mifepristone can be frightening, especially when you’re unsure whether there is still time to act. You don’t need to figure that out yourself. Call the Abortion Pill Reversal Network at 1-877-558-0333 as soon as possible and tell them when you took mifepristone. They can explain whether abortion pill reversal may still be an option and connect you with an appropriate provider. You can also contact Collage if you need someone to speak with while you work through your next steps. We’re here to help you. *Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services. **All abortion information in this blog is based on accurate information at the time of writing.
Seeing another positive pregnancy test after having had a past abortion may bring up memories or emotions from that experience. If you already know you don’t want another abortion, you may be wondering what other choices you have and whether either feels realistic for your life right now. You have time to learn about your options and the available support. Collage is here to give you a place to discuss your circumstances so you can decide what’s right for you. Schedule a no-cost appointment today to learn more about your pregnancy and what your next steps could look like. And read on to learn more about your pregnancy options besides abortion. Consider What Parenting Would Require You may want to parent but have concerns about whether you can make it work. Finances, housing, childcare, your relationship, work, or school can all influence how possible this option feels right now. Before deciding that those challenges make parenting unrealistic, it can help to identify your biggest concerns individually. Some of those concerns may have solutions you haven’t considered yet. Think about the support you already have, along with what you would need during pregnancy and after your baby arrives. Knowing where the gaps are can make it easier to find resources rather than trying to solve everything at once. Learn More About Adoption If you don’t want another abortion but aren’t ready to parent, adoption is another option. Today, a woman making an adoption plan can have a significant role in deciding what that plan looks like. Depending on the type of adoption, you may be able to choose an adoptive family and decide what level of contact you would like after placement. Open, semi-open, and closed adoption offer different levels of communication and privacy. Speaking with a licensed adoption professional can help you understand these differences, your rights, and what the process would involve before you make any commitments. Discuss Your Options in a Confidential Space Having had an abortion before does not mean you have to make the same pregnancy decision again. Your feelings, circumstances, priorities, or perspective may be different this time. If you know you don’t want another abortion, start by learning what parenting and adoption could realistically look like in your current situation. Collage provides a place to talk about your pregnancy and the concerns influencing your decision. We can also connect you with adoption agencies and community organizations that provide the support you’re seeking. Reaching out doesn’t lock you into a specific decision. Schedule a no-cost appointment with Collage today to get your questions answered and explore the options available to you. Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services.
If your girlfriend is facing an unexpected pregnancy and considering the abortion pill, you're probably wondering about costs and whether insurance will cover it.
