College Tips For Single Moms
August 13, 2020
Going to college as a single mom can be a big challenge. But it’s completely possible. If you’re pregnant or a single mom and you’re thinking about college or if you’re in college and you find yourself unexpectedly pregnant, you can finish school. It may seem overwhelming at times, but it’s do-able!
Of course, college looks different when you’re a parent than it does for a traditional college student. You might be juggling a job, childcare, classes, and studying. You may have to squeeze homework and studying into nap-times. And you may feel like you’re learning every life lesson all at once — how to be a parent, how to be a student, how to adult.
If you’re a single mom and a student, here are a few tips that may help:
- Ask for help. You don’t have to do this alone. If you don’t already have a support network, create one. Make friends with your neighbors or at the library or at church or in a mommy-and-me group that meets once a month. Seek out other students who are parents so that you can help each other. You can be strong and independent and still ask for help. We’re made for community, and you’ll need a community of friends or family to help you do this.
- Take advantage of available money. There are grants and scholarships designed with single moms in mind. That’s free money you won’t have to pay back! Talk to your college financial aid office, and they’ll give you all the information you need. You also may qualify for the federal WIC (Women, Infants, and Children) program to help pay for food for you and your little one. There’s a Pregnancy Assistance Fund program through the federal government which provides support services for your health, your child’s health, your education, and some practical things like diapers and baby equipment. And some college scholarships even include money for transportation and childcare. If you want to get a degree, there are resources to help you pay for it.
- Write down goals. And look at them often. There will be discouraging days, so having a written reminder of why you’re working so hard may help you get through the hard days. Writing daily or weekly goals that you can check off as you accomplish will also motivate you to stay on track for the big goals.
- Be organized. Live by lists and schedules. Daily and weekly to-do lists will help make sure nothing falls through the cracks. And schedules will assure you that there is a time for everything. So when you’re playing with your baby or having coffee with a friend, you don’t have to feel guilty because it’s scheduled in and homework and study times are also scheduled in.
- Practice saying no. You can’t do everything, and you especially can’t do everything right now. In order to prioritize your child and school, you’ll have to say no to other things. Remember – there are seasons of life, and for this season, your yeses are very limited. If it isn’t helping you take care of your child, complete your degree, or maintain your own mental health, it’s probably a no for now.
- Communicate with your professors. At the very beginning of each semester, talk with your professors and let them know that you’re a single parent. Your professors are human beings capable of compassion, and most of them want to help you succeed. As long as you aren’t taking advantage of the situation or using your circumstances as an excuse to get a free pass, your professors will probably work with you and be very understanding. And talk with your college student health office too. They’ll help communicate with your professors and provide lots of practical support for you.
- Take care of yourself. You can’t take very good care of your baby if you aren’t taking care of you. Schedule in time for healthy meals and exercise — you can go for a walk or a run while pushing a stroller or do some exercises on your living room floor while playing with your child. Remember – food, exercise, sleep, and friendship are not luxuries. You need these things to be emotionally and physically healthy.
There may be moments when you wonder if you can really do this. You can! It will look different than you may have imagined college, but you’ve got this!
An unexpected pregnancy can already feel like a lot to carry. However, when your partner is strongly pushing you toward abortion, and you’re not sure what you want, it can feel even heavier. You may feel torn between your own emotions and his expectations, trying to keep the peace while feeling anxious or confused. If you’re in this situation, take a deep breath. At Collage, we understand how emotionally complicated this can be. You deserve a safe place to talk through what you’re feeling and be treated with respect. You don’t have to rush into a decision. Schedule a free appointment to learn how we can help you navigate this situation. It’s Your Decision Sometimes a partner’s reaction is rooted in panic. He may be thinking about finances, school, your relationship, or how unprepared he feels. In his mind, abortion may seem like the fastest solution. When someone repeatedly insists on one outcome, refuses to listen, or makes you feel guilty for even considering other options, it can start to feel like your voice doesn’t matter. And in a moment this vulnerable, your voice matters more than ever. Giving Yourself Space If conversations feel tense or emotionally draining, it’s okay to take a step back. You have the right to say something like, “I need time to think. I’m not ready to decide right now.” Creating a little space can help you reconnect with your own thoughts instead of constantly reacting to his. Sometimes the best thing you can do is pause, breathe, and remind yourself that you don’t have to figure everything out in one day. You Deserve Respect It’s also important to pay attention to warning signs. If your partner threatens to leave, withdraw support, manipulate you emotionally, or isolate you from others unless you choose abortion, that is not love. That is control. You deserve a relationship where your safety and well-being are protected, not threatened. If you ever feel unsafe, reach out for immediate support. The National Domestic Violence Hotline (800-799-7233) offers 24/7 confidential resources to help you get the assistance you need. You Deserve a Safe Place to Talk It Through At Collage, we’re here to support you. You don’t have to walk into our center with a decision already made. You can come in simply because you need someone to listen, help you process, and remind you that you are not alone. This is your pregnancy and future. If your partner is pressuring you and you’re feeling unsure, please know that help is available. We offer a calm, caring environment where you can talk openly, ask questions, and explore your options without feeling judged or persuaded to make a specific decision. You are not alone in this. Schedule an appointment with Collage today. We’re here to walk with you, one step at a time. Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services .
Facing an unplanned pregnancy can bring up difficult questions, especially when it comes to your relationship. You may be wondering whether you are required to tell your partner you’re considering an abortion, or whether it’s okay to keep that information private. Fear of conflict, concern about pressure, or a desire to protect your emotional well-being can all play a role. These feelings are common, and it’s okay to take time to think through what feels safest and healthiest for you. Collage offers a confidential and non-judgmental space where you can discuss these concerns without pressure. Before making any decisions, we provide cost-free pregnancy services , including ultrasounds, to help you understand important details about your pregnancy. Our goal is to give you accurate medical information and the space you need to move forward with clarity. You’re welcome to schedule a private, confidential appointment to learn more when you feel ready. Understanding Your Autonomy In many states, adults are not legally required to tell a partner if they’re considering or planning an abortion. Medical decisions about your body are generally protected by privacy laws, meaning the decision is legally yours. Some exceptions exist, such as parental involvement laws for minors, but partner notification is typically not required for adults. Even when the law is clear, the emotional side of this decision can feel complicated. You may feel torn between maintaining privacy and wanting honesty in your relationship. There is no single “right” approach, only what best supports your well-being and circumstances. When Safety Is a Concern In some relationships, sharing your thoughts with a partner may lead to understanding or emotional support. In others, it may not feel safe. If you’re worried about pressure, manipulation, anger, or physical harm, prioritizing your safety is essential. You’re never obligated to share information that could put you at risk. If you feel unsafe or unsure, confidential help is available through the National Domestic Violence Hotline (800-799-SAFE). Support is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Why Medical Information Matters Whether or not you involve your partner, having accurate medical information is an important step. An ultrasound can help confirm gestational age, pregnancy location, and whether the pregnancy is viable. These details matter for your health and can help you feel more grounded as you consider your next steps. You Are Not Alone At Collage, we offer a confidential, respectful environment where your voice and concerns are taken seriously. Our team provides pregnancy confirmation, emotional support, and space to think through your situation without pressure or judgment. You deserve time, clarity, and peace of mind as you decide what is right for your life. Connect with Collage to discuss your questions in a supportive and confidential setting. Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services.
Holiday gatherings often bring familiar traditions, questions, and expectations. But when you’re carrying the news of an unexpected pregnancy that you haven’t shared, the season may feel different this year. You might be participating in celebrations while quietly navigating thoughts and emotions that others cannot see. If you want clarity about your pregnancy or a private space to consider your next steps, Collage offers free services, including pregnancy tests, ultrasounds, and confidential consultations, to support your needs. Schedule your appointment today. Prepare Yourself, Not the Perfect Conversation You may not be ready to share your news, and that’s okay. What can help is preparing yourself: deciding on the topics you’re comfortable discussing, the questions you want to avoid, and the boundaries you want to set. This proactivity allows you to answer without feeling like you need to tell all and not overshare. Create Space Throughout the Gathering Instead of thinking about the whole event at once, break it into smaller, manageable moments. Emotional regulation becomes easier when you give yourself space to reset. Try: Stepping outside for a few breaths of fresh air Finding a quiet room for a brief pause Taking a short walk after a meal Giving yourself permission to excuse yourself from overwhelming conversations These small steps can help protect your peace. Remember that if at any point during the gathering you’re ready to go home, go ahead. Take care of yourself by calling it a day when necessary. Meet Your Basic Needs Early pregnancy symptoms such as nausea and fatigue can be uncomfortable during gatherings. Come prepared to meet your own needs by bringing pregnancy nausea candy, snacks to settle your stomach, and a water bottle. Store these items in your purse, knowing they’re ready when you need them. You Don’t Have to Navigate This Season Alone If you want clarity before facing holiday conversations, Collage can help you understand your pregnancy and answer questions in a calm, confidential setting, which can make these boundaries easier to hold. Contact us whenever you’re ready to schedule a free appointment. Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services .
