5 Things To Consider Before Living Together

You’ve been dating for a while and things seem to be getting serious. You think you’re ready to take the next step and are wondering if maybe it’s time to move in together.

You’re Not Alone

If those thoughts have crossed you mind, you’re not alone. Cohabitation, or living together, has increased by more than 1,500% since the 1960’s according to a survey from the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia. This shift has been attributed to many factors from the current state of the economy to the availability of birth control. Whatever the cause, the cultural acceptance and perceived convenience continue to lead many couples to consider this as an option, often without weighing all the pros and cons of how it will affect their relationship both in the short and long-term.

While there are many things to consider before moving in together, here are five that may not immediately come to mind, but should be given some serious thought.

#1 – Living Together – The Test Drive

So are you thinking about going for a test drive? Often times couples express that living together will give them good idea of just how compatible they are before getting married. They see the divorce rate, or have experienced divorce in their family, and think living together will help them avoid going down that path.

Often guys will jokingly equate it to checking out a car. They sometimes say things like, “You wouldn’t buy a car without test driving it. Why would you get married without a test drive?” I’m sure they mean no harm, but think about what that communicates. What if they don’t like the test drive? What is your return policy? But that isn’t the only problem with this way of thinking. Studies show that couples that live together are actually more likely to divorce than those who don’t. They also tend to be less satisfied with their marriages if they do indeed get married. Taking a car for a test drive is very different than owning one and having to keep up with the scheduled maintenance to keep it running well.

#2 – Living Together – It Just Happens

Maybe you end up living together because you just get tired of carting your toothbrush and an extra pair of clothes around with you all the time. Sometimes when couples end up living together, it wasn’t something they planned, it just happened. After dating for a while they started sleeping over at each other’s place occasionally. Soon they were sleeping over a lot and then they were practically living together. They wonder if it will be cheaper and more convenient to just move in together and a quick decision is made, thinking that if it doesn’t work out they can get out quickly too. They go down this gradual slope, what researches call “sliding, not deciding” and they find themselves living together with no real point of decision, no rings, no ceremonies, and often no real conversation about why the want to live together and what that means. If asked why they are living together, they often answer, “It just happened.”

#3 – Living Together – Very Different Expectations

Because living together sometimes “just happens” without a real conversation and clear expectations, couples often find themselves frustrated because it isn’t what they thought it would be. Obviously each couple is different, but researchers have found men and women have different attitudes and expectations about living together. In general, women tend to see living together as the next step toward marriage while men see it as a way to test the relationship or even delay commitment. These differences even affect the relationship if it does end up in marriage, often leading to negative experiences as they interact, lower levels of commitment and a higher rate of infidelity. Setting clear expectations is important for any relationship to avoid frustration and disappointment.

#4 – Living Together – Easy In, Easy Out…Right?

Couples approach living together with a very different mindset then they do marriage. While men and women have very different expectations when it comes to cohabitation, they do tend to agree that their standards for a live-in significant other are lower than they would be for a spouse. This makes it much easier to enter a live-in situation. But what they thought was a cost saving, low-risk arrangement often isn’t so easy to get out of. Shared rent, shared furniture, shared pets and potentially shared children make getting out more challenging than they ever imagined. It’s like those companies who show up on campus offering you a free t-shirt for signing up for a credit card. Sure you get the t-shirt, but you also get the 20% interest rate after the first six months. What you thought was a low cost t-shirt can end up costing way more than you ever expected.

#5 – Living Together – Because I’m Not Sure I Want To Be Married

Often couples find themselves debating living together because they are truly in love, but one or both partners really aren’t sure marriage is a good idea or even relevant. They may have experienced divorce or abuse in their family and have associated those feeling with marriage rather than the brokenness of their parents. They don’t want to experience those themselves, so they avoid marriage and commitment. Yet, those same feelings occur in live-in situations, and they actually occur more frequently. Studies consistently show that marriage increases the well being of women, men and children. They report being happier, more content and they have lower death rates than those who live together. While marriage isn’t a guarantee of commitment or happiness, and no one says it is easy, statistics say it does increase your chances over living together.

A Big Decision

Living together is a big decision and there many factors to consider in addition to the five we mentioned. If living together is something you’re thinking about and need someone to talk to, we’d love to sit down and listen and help you work through all the pros and cons.

So what if you’ve already made the move and are having second thoughts? We’re here for you too.

Bottom line, we care about you and want you to have healthy relationships and a promising future. If we can ever help, please contact us.

< Older Post

Newer Post >

How Soon After Sex Should I Get Tested for an STD?

November 6, 2026

New ParagraphIf you recently had sex and are wondering when to get tested for an STD, there is not one waiting period that applies to every infection. Different STDs take different amounts of time to become detectable, and the type of test being used can also affect when an infection may show up. Testing too soon after exposure may yield a negative result even when an infection is present. If you are unsure about your timing, schedule an appointment with Collage. We offer no-cost testing and treatment for chlamydia and gonorrhea , and our licensed medical professionals are here to answer your questions. Treatment is provided if a test is positive, and medical professionals are available to answer your questions. Why Timing Matters After exposure to an STD, there can be a period of time before a test can detect the infection. That window is not the same for every STD. Some infections may become detectable sooner than others, and certain situations may call for repeat testing after an initial negative result. This is why testing the day after sex will not necessarily give you the information you are looking for. A medical professional can consider when the exposure occurred, your symptoms, and the type of testing available. You Can Have an STD Without Symptoms Do not assume that feeling fine means there is no reason to get tested. Some sexually transmitted infections cause no symptoms or only mild symptoms. When symptoms do occur, they may include: Sores or bumps on the genitals or in the oral or rectal area Painful or burning urination Unusual or odorous vaginal discharge Unusual vaginal bleeding Pain during sex Sore, swollen lymph nodes, often in the groin area Fever Chlamydia may cause symptoms such as unusual discharge or burning with urination, but many people don’t notice symptoms at all. Gonorrhea can cause similar symptoms and may affect the genitals, rectum, or throat. However, because symptoms aren't always present, testing can identify an infection that might otherwise go unnoticed. If you develop symptoms or learn that a sexual partner has tested positive for an STD, contact a healthcare professional rather than waiting to see whether symptoms appear or go away. Why Testing Is Worth Doing Some untreated STDs can cause problems beyond the initial infection. Depending on the infection, complications can include arthritis, certain cancers, infertility, and pelvic inflammatory disease. Testing gives you the opportunity to identify an infection and receive treatment if available. A medical professional can also explain whether follow-up or repeat testing is recommended. Regular screening may also be appropriate for some people based on factors such as age, sexual history, new or multiple partners, and previous STDs. Start With Testing at Collage Collage offers testing for chlamydia and gonorrhea at no cost. Both infections commonly occur without obvious symptoms, so testing can be important even when you feel well. Both infections can be treated with the appropriate antibiotics. If your test is positive, Collage will contact you to schedule an appointment to come in for treatment. Schedule an initial STD testing appointment with Collage today to ask your questions and find out what is appropriate for you. Call us in Kearney at 308.234.9880 and in Grand Island at 308.675.2217. Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services.

Can I Change My Mind After Taking the First Abortion Pill?

September 30, 2026

If you took the first abortion pill, it’s possible to start wishing you hadn’t. The regret may have hit you immediately, or it might have taken a few hours to realize that you want to continue the pregnancy. Either way, there may still be something you can do: abortion pill reversal (APR) may be an option. The first drug used in the abortion pill regimen is usually mifepristone. If you have taken mifepristone but now want to continue your pregnancy, call the Abortion Pill Reversal Network at 1-877-558-0333 right away. Their Helpline is available 24/7 and can connect you with a medical provider who can administer APR. If You Have Only Taken the First Pill Mifepristone works by blocking progesterone. Progesterone helps maintain the lining of the uterus during pregnancy. When this hormone is blocked, the uterine lining thins, and the pregnancy ends. The second drug in the abortion pill regimen is misoprostol , which causes the uterus to contract and expel the pregnancy. Abortion pill reversal involves giving progesterone after mifepristone in an effort to allow the pregnancy to continue. Don’t Wait for Symptoms Before Calling You may wonder whether you should wait before deciding what to do. But if you want to try to continue the pregnancy, call first. It’s critical to start the protocol as soon as possible, ideally within 24 to 48 hours of taking mifepristone. However, you should still call even when more time has passed; it may not be too late. A medical provider can determine whether APR may still be appropriate. Does Reversal Always Work? Abortion pill reversal cannot guarantee that the pregnancy will continue. One published study reported ongoing pregnancy rates of approximately 64% to 68% with certain progesterone regimens, but individual outcomes vary. The important thing is to get medical guidance quickly rather than trying to determine your chances on your own. What if You Already Took Misoprostol? If you have already taken misoprostol, contact a healthcare professional promptly and explain exactly what you took and when. You should also seek immediate medical attention if you develop symptoms that concern you or believe you may be experiencing a medical emergency. Make the Call Now Changing your mind after taking mifepristone can be frightening, especially when you’re unsure whether there is still time to act. You don’t need to figure that out yourself. Call the Abortion Pill Reversal Network at 1-877-558-0333 as soon as possible and tell them when you took mifepristone. They can explain whether abortion pill reversal may still be an option and connect you with an appropriate provider. You can also contact Collage if you need someone to speak with while you work through your next steps. We’re here to help you. *Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services. **All abortion information in this blog is based on accurate information at the time of writing.

I’ve Already Had an Abortion and Don’t Want Another One. What Are My Options?

September 7, 2026

Seeing another positive pregnancy test after having had a past abortion may bring up memories or emotions from that experience. If you already know you don’t want another abortion, you may be wondering what other choices you have and whether either feels realistic for your life right now. You have time to learn about your options and the available support. Collage is here to give you a place to discuss your circumstances so you can decide what’s right for you. Schedule a no-cost appointment today to learn more about your pregnancy and what your next steps could look like. And read on to learn more about your pregnancy options besides abortion. Consider What Parenting Would Require You may want to parent but have concerns about whether you can make it work. Finances, housing, childcare, your relationship, work, or school can all influence how possible this option feels right now. Before deciding that those challenges make parenting unrealistic, it can help to identify your biggest concerns individually. Some of those concerns may have solutions you haven’t considered yet. Think about the support you already have, along with what you would need during pregnancy and after your baby arrives. Knowing where the gaps are can make it easier to find resources rather than trying to solve everything at once. Learn More About Adoption If you don’t want another abortion but aren’t ready to parent, adoption is another option. Today, a woman making an adoption plan can have a significant role in deciding what that plan looks like. Depending on the type of adoption, you may be able to choose an adoptive family and decide what level of contact you would like after placement. Open, semi-open, and closed adoption offer different levels of communication and privacy. Speaking with a licensed adoption professional can help you understand these differences, your rights, and what the process would involve before you make any commitments. Discuss Your Options in a Confidential Space Having had an abortion before does not mean you have to make the same pregnancy decision again. Your feelings, circumstances, priorities, or perspective may be different this time. If you know you don’t want another abortion, start by learning what parenting and adoption could realistically look like in your current situation. Collage provides a place to talk about your pregnancy and the concerns influencing your decision. We can also connect you with adoption agencies and community organizations that provide the support you’re seeking. Reaching out doesn’t lock you into a specific decision. Schedule a no-cost appointment with Collage today to get your questions answered and explore the options available to you. Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services.