Fatherlessness

27 million fatherless homes in the US today.”-@tmproject

(The Mentoring Project)

Fatherlessness is not only affecting children around the world but the children in our own neighborhoods. Many of the children who attend our elementary and high schools right here in Kearney, Nebraska are growing up without a consistent father in their life. In small towns, it’s easy to convince ourselves that fatherlessness is not affecting our community. The truth of the matter is that there are real consequences for children who grow up with an absentee father.

Fatherless boys and girls are: twice as likely to drop out of high school; twice as likely to end up in jail; four times more likely to need help for emotional or behavioral problems. -DHHS 1999

Becoming a father may come unexpectedly for some men. As the Client Relations Coordinator here at Collage, I see that fathers are often not in the picture when women come in for a pregnancy test. Regardless of relationship status or intentions of involvement, the potential father has rights. According to Nebraska Children’s Home Society (NCHS), if he does not think he is the father, he has the right to a paternity test and the right to hire an attorney. If a paternity test indicates that he is in fact the father, he then has the right to file for custody or visitation rights. For questions about paternity testing, contact NCHS for more information.

A father is responsible for the financial support of his child which is likely to be based on his income as well as the mother’s. The reality is that children need more than food in their tummy and clothes on their back…..they need a daddy that will love and support them physically AND emotionally.

According to a study presented at the American Sociological Association, nearly 90% of the fathers with their children in intact two-parent families, said that being a father is the most fulfilling role a man can have*. Popular sitcoms tend to push a dead-beat dad mentality but dads have the chance of a lifetime to impact their children’s lives in a powerful way!

Higher levels of father involvement in activities with their children, such as eating meals together, helping with homework, and going on family outings, has been found to be associated with fewer child behavior problems, higher levels of sociability, and higher levels of academic performance in children and adolescents.”**

For those preparing to be a first-time daddy soon, there are resources in the Kearney area available to help! For example, Good Samaritan Hospital provides Boot Camp for New Dads! This class is every 6th Monday night from 7-10pm. The cost is $10 unless already enrolled in their childbirth classes in which case it is FREE. If attending a class is not an option, don’t be afraid to reach out to men in the community who are weathered veterans in the midst of fatherhood. They can be a great source of support.

Here are some other resources I stumbled upon while doing my research. Check them out to see what’s being done to battle the true epidemic of fatherlessness in our nation.

C-SPAN-Supporting Responsible Fatherhood

The Mentoring Project

1st Chapter of Fatherless Generation by John Sowers

Fatherhood Initiative-Nebraska Father of the Year Hall of Fame 2010

The Fatherless Generation Foundation

*Source: Yeung, W. Jean, et al. “Children’s Time with Fathers in Intact Families.” Paper presented at the Annual Meeting of the American Sociological Association, Chicago, IL, August, 2000.

**Source: Mosley, J., and E. Thomson. ”Fathering Behavior and Child Outcomes: The Role of Race and Poverty.” In W. Marsiglio (ed.), Fatherhood: Contemporary Theory, Research and Social Policy. Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage Publications, 1995: 148-165.